There are so many things out of whack with "the risky rise of the good grade pill" picture that it is hard to know where to start. What would be the conditions that would lead to the following? 1. Parents are requesting that doctors prescribe stimulants for their kids to "make them smarter." 2. Teens believe that they need to medicate themselves in order to combat the need to sleep (Note to society: sleep is a basic necessity, throughout life, but of particular importance during years of growth.) such that they can perform well enough to make their parents and coaches happy and "get into the quote-unquote right school." 3. There is an imagined link between class rank and the abuse of prescription medication.
The prevalence of stimulant abuse amongst teens is not new news. But it is a frightening symptom of the misguided priorities that too many children have absorbed from the pressure cooker in which they've been raised. When did sleep become optional? When did it become unquestioned for a high school junior to "not come out of their room except to use the bathroom" as a middle-school child I know described her older brother's behavior? ("If you have APs that's what you have to do, she told me, matter-of-factly.) Smart parents know this is wrong, yet have unwittingly accepted it.
Having worked with students who (however barely) have survived the "race to nowhere" and ended up one of the ridiculously "lucky" (by the numbers) few who "get in" to the most elite name-brand universities, I have had an inside look at what can happen after years of sleepless nights in pursuit of this dream. It is often not very pretty. If students arrive at the school of their (?) dreams too exhausted, too burnt out, and too unaccustomed to time that is unstructured, the results are often depression, substance abuse, or less dramatically but still unfortunate, the inability to fully embrace, contribute to, and benefit from the vast richness of experience they have "earned." It is not a good return on investment, especially when what has been invested (childhood) can never be regained. Never. No degree from anywhere offers a do-over for what was sacrificed.
If we are looking at the big picture, the status quo makes no sense. To be blunt, most kids, including thousands who are textbook "perfect candidates" will not get into the small group of schools which are considered "the right ones." So, why are their lives being organized for them (we could end that sentence right there)... as if they will, and as if that is the point of their early lives? There are literally hundreds of schools where they can have a rewarding and productive and excellent college experience. Can that be ok? Can where your kid ends up not be the marker of your success as a parent? Instead, if we have to judge ourselves, I think we ought to withhold that judgment until much later. Could we aspire, instead of molding the perfect college applicant, to offering our children the opportunity as children to try things, do things because they care about them, and have some sense of what actually matters to them. There is no pill for this.
Balancing Act: If you have very young kids, can you think about whether your child is enrolled in an activity because he or she shows an interest and seems to enjoy it now, or whether you signed them up because you thought you "should"? Or because you think it will lead to something else (scholastic or athletic or otherwise)? Remind me why you need your child to read before kindergarten? If your kids are older, do you make time to talk about things other than school or the future? Even a few minutes? Do you give them the message that you value their health (sleep, nutrition, well-being) even more than the grade or the accolade?
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